As I contemplate the heavens, I have found myself thinking a lot about death. After all, death comes immediately before the heavens... does it not? What will my legacy be? What do I want people to say about me when I'm gone? More importantly, what do I want to teach my children before I leave this planet? Thinking about all of these things can't but help me feel grateful for the life I have been given, or if you prefer...chosen. I live in a place and time in this world where I, as a woman, have the right to choose what religion I want to follow (or not), who I marry if I decide to marry at all, how many children I want to have if any. I also get to choose what kind of person I want to be. A lawyer or doctor were out of the question for women less than 100 years ago, but the sky is the limit now. This post is not meant to be a women's rights rant, merely a way of expressing gratitude for things I often take for granted.
My parents are very different from one another and the lessons they have individually instilled in me have blended to create what drives me. What do my beliefs, lessons and actions say to my children? Are these the things I want them to remember me by?
Tomorrow is the one year anniversary of my husband's Nana's death. This morning I visited her grave for the first time since her burial and as I stood there, I was overcome by sadness. She was an amazing woman, mother, friend and wife, which only makes the pain of her death so much greater for the people she was closest too. Her legacy to her family is one of grace, dignity, respect and love. My husband and I met after my husband's Papa had passed away, but when Nana spoke of her husband, you could feel the love and respect she still had for him. It practically broke my heart every time she spoke of him, which she did often. The one thing that eased my husband's grief when she passed was that it was her belief that she was going to be reunited with him. What a beautiful gift she left for her family and friends.
I can only hope that the memories I leave for my children are as great as the ones she left for hers. The saying, "Live every day like it's your last" has been running through my head. If today was my last day on earth, would I have any regrets? I want my days to be filled with light, and to choose to never have a bad day, to forgive the people that have hurt me, even if I never say the words to them. If I don't have anything nice to say, I want to not say anything at all. I want to smile more, and inspire others to do the same... Or simply: Live. Laugh. Love.
We miss you Nana.
Wednesday 24 October 2012
Monday 15 October 2012
Contemplating the Heavens
What is spirituality? Wikipedia defines it as: The concept of an ultimate or an alleged immaterial reality;[1] an inner path enabling a person to discover the essence of his/her being; or the "deepest values and meanings by which people live."[2] Spiritual practices, including meditation, prayer and contemplation, are intended to develop an individual's inner life. Spiritual experiences can include being connected to a larger reality, yielding a more comprehensive self; joining with other individuals or the human community; with nature or the cosmos; or with the divine realm.[3] Spirituality is often experienced as a source of inspiration or orientation in life.[4] It can encompass belief in immaterial realities or experiences of the immanent or transcendent nature of the world.
But what does spirituality mean to me? Even though I am not religious, I consider myself to be a spiritual person... I believe in an energy/higher power that connects us all to each other and nature. Most mainstream religions believe in some variation of this concept. Science has actually proven that our energy extends beyond our physical bodies, whether we are plant or animal. Even atoms of metal and wood have the same energy frequency of human beings. Does practicing meditation or prayer alone make you spiritual? Or does it require intent to connect to a larger reality? By definition, contemplation of spirituality is in itself a spiritual practice. Can "contemplating the heavens" as Gretchen Rubin did in her Happiness Project, evoke spirituality? Gretchen states in her book that "according to the research, yes. Studies show that spiritual people are relatively happier; they're more mentally and physically healthy, deal better with stress, have better marriages and live longer."
Spirituality and spiritual practices have always been interesting to me whether or not I agree or disagree with them. So when my friend began telling me about this incredible book series that changed her thoughts on spirituality, I couldn't wait to get my hands on it. Two years later, when she finally lent me the first book, Anastasia in The Ringing Cedar Series, by Vladimir Megre, it just happened to be the month in my happiness project to "contemplate the heavens". (The universe is always working to help me just when I need it)! 17 years ago, while traveling up the Ob River, Megre came to meet a woman named Anastasia living in the Siberian. He describes in detail how he was astounded by her knowledge, power and wisdom. I won't go into details, but I will say this... The book is full of myth-shattering messages that make you wonder, "Can this be true"? Whether or not I believe the words written in the book, one of the underlying messages that stuck with me was to be grateful. One of my commandments in my happiness project is just that... be grateful. I truly believe if you can find something to be grateful for in every situation, it's hard to be negative and unhappy.
Last weekend was Thanksgiving. I love this holiday not only for the turkey and time with family, but because it is a day to truly reflect on all things we are grateful for. This year I am thankful I found inspiration to go back to school; a dream I had been pushing off for years... For my children who are smart, kind and most importantly, healthy... For my husband who supports my dreams and keeps me on my toes... For my family who love me unconditionally and catch me when I fall... The fact that I have a list of friends that are amazing, make me laugh and keep me sane, to name a few.
This month, every morning when I wake up, I will think of all the things I am grateful for that day. Gretchen also used "wasted" time to practice "gratitude meditation". For example, waiting for a train to pass, waiting for a red light, etc. What an awesome idea. I have noticed a huge change in my attitude this year already by focusing on my happiness and gratitude. I'm not perfect by any means and I still have my moments, but I don't dwell on them like I used to. Gretchen also says, "Other people cultivate unhappiness as a way to control others. They cling to unhappiness because without it they'd forgo the special consideration that unhappiness secures: the claim to pity and attention". Life is too short to be one of those people. "In our daily lives, we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but the gratefulness that makes us happy". -Albert Clarke
But what does spirituality mean to me? Even though I am not religious, I consider myself to be a spiritual person... I believe in an energy/higher power that connects us all to each other and nature. Most mainstream religions believe in some variation of this concept. Science has actually proven that our energy extends beyond our physical bodies, whether we are plant or animal. Even atoms of metal and wood have the same energy frequency of human beings. Does practicing meditation or prayer alone make you spiritual? Or does it require intent to connect to a larger reality? By definition, contemplation of spirituality is in itself a spiritual practice. Can "contemplating the heavens" as Gretchen Rubin did in her Happiness Project, evoke spirituality? Gretchen states in her book that "according to the research, yes. Studies show that spiritual people are relatively happier; they're more mentally and physically healthy, deal better with stress, have better marriages and live longer."
Spirituality and spiritual practices have always been interesting to me whether or not I agree or disagree with them. So when my friend began telling me about this incredible book series that changed her thoughts on spirituality, I couldn't wait to get my hands on it. Two years later, when she finally lent me the first book, Anastasia in The Ringing Cedar Series, by Vladimir Megre, it just happened to be the month in my happiness project to "contemplate the heavens". (The universe is always working to help me just when I need it)! 17 years ago, while traveling up the Ob River, Megre came to meet a woman named Anastasia living in the Siberian. He describes in detail how he was astounded by her knowledge, power and wisdom. I won't go into details, but I will say this... The book is full of myth-shattering messages that make you wonder, "Can this be true"? Whether or not I believe the words written in the book, one of the underlying messages that stuck with me was to be grateful. One of my commandments in my happiness project is just that... be grateful. I truly believe if you can find something to be grateful for in every situation, it's hard to be negative and unhappy.
Last weekend was Thanksgiving. I love this holiday not only for the turkey and time with family, but because it is a day to truly reflect on all things we are grateful for. This year I am thankful I found inspiration to go back to school; a dream I had been pushing off for years... For my children who are smart, kind and most importantly, healthy... For my husband who supports my dreams and keeps me on my toes... For my family who love me unconditionally and catch me when I fall... The fact that I have a list of friends that are amazing, make me laugh and keep me sane, to name a few.
This month, every morning when I wake up, I will think of all the things I am grateful for that day. Gretchen also used "wasted" time to practice "gratitude meditation". For example, waiting for a train to pass, waiting for a red light, etc. What an awesome idea. I have noticed a huge change in my attitude this year already by focusing on my happiness and gratitude. I'm not perfect by any means and I still have my moments, but I don't dwell on them like I used to. Gretchen also says, "Other people cultivate unhappiness as a way to control others. They cling to unhappiness because without it they'd forgo the special consideration that unhappiness secures: the claim to pity and attention". Life is too short to be one of those people. "In our daily lives, we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but the gratefulness that makes us happy". -Albert Clarke
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