Just another minute...

It's the most wonderful time of the year because it's starting to feel like Christmas! While grabbing a coffee on my break at school today, I heard my first carol of the year playing and I couldn't help getting that feeling. You know, the one that makes you want to bust out the decorations and start baking? My neighbours have started turning on their Christmas lights which means my husband will begin to be harassed to put ours up starting tomorrow. ;)

Next month's goal in my "Happiness Project" is to be more mindful, to stay in the moment. What a perfect time of year to hone these skills. Nothing like major family commitments, an overloaded work and homework schedule and honouring family traditions to distract you from the task at hand. But as I delve into all the festivities December is sure to bring, I am committing to stay in the moment. And to also pay attention to the quiet moments that may have otherwise passed me by.

Tonight after bath and reading time for the kiddies, I tucked Aidan in, tucked Natalie in as per our routine and was about to head downstairs when I heard Aidan call me back into his room. His needed me to lay his pillow flat. "Bud, your pillow was laying flat when I tucked you in a minute ago", I reminded him. He relied, "I know Mom, I just wanted to spend another minute with you". For all the grief my 6 year old (going on 60 year old) son gives me, he occasionally says little things like that that melt my heart. I laid his pillow down and was about to leave when a little voice in my head reminded me to stay in the moment. I asked him how his day was (I had left for school just as he was getting up this am and didn't arrive back home till the late afternoon) and as we chatted, he played with my hair. It was about two minutes we spent chatting and I couldn't help think that one day I will most likely never have moments like that with him... and that I really needed to cherish him.

So whether it is a small moment like the one I had tonight, or an annual event like packing up to find the perfect Christmas tree, I am committed to "be mindful" of my attitude and to stay in the moment.

Two weeks ago, our family adopted two new babies... Fur babies to be exact! I know what your are thinking... Who in their right mind would adopt two puppies at the same time? It has been very busy, but our new additions are very sweet and they happen to be the cutest little things you have ever seen! (I may be slightly biased, but they are seriously adorable). Which happens to be a very good thing, because if they weren't, I would have lost my mind by now with all of the pee and poo I have cleaned up! But having two is easier in some ways. For example, they don't cry at night... not even once because they have each other to snuggle with. I have found myself comparing the experience of new puppies to the first few weeks I had my own babies. Yes, both involve a ton of pee and poo... And I just can't believe how fast they are growing up! And that they have such little personalities, right from the get go, just like my own children did. Jax is my snuggly boy. He will let his sister beat him up for awhile, but when she crosses the line, he lets her know. He gets very upset if you scold him for peeing on the floor and wants to come snuggle you immediately to say sorry. Jules on the other hand is full of energy and always wants to play. She is eager to please and bosses her brother around even though he has a major size advantage. Both are very sweet though in completely different ways and most importantly, the kids just adore them. Even Toby my cat (who sometimes thinks he is a dog) is coming around to the puppies and I'm sure in time he will let them know who the real boss is, lol! Yes, the puppies are a huge addition of work on top of our already busy schedules, but I love seeing the smiles on Aidan and Natalie's faces when they are with them and that is definitely something I will always cherish.

So here's to staying in the moment... Enjoying every little bit of my life (the good and not so good) and to making the most of it!

Thumpy, little elephant

The least strained and most natural ways of the soul are the most beautiful; the best occupations are the least forced. - Michel de Montaigne

November's Happiness Project is to "Pursue a Passion". A few years ago while attending a seminar on pursuing your dreams, the speaker (Tama Kieves) asked us to write down the things that we would do today if social judgements and money were not an issue. For this month's Happiness Project goal, I thought it would be helpful to do this exercise again. So here's mine:

Photograph/Appreciate Nature

Read "fluffy" novels

Go to a concert

Meditate/Run (Same thing for me)

Eat great, healthy food

Design a space

Read architecture magazines

Snuggle with my cat

Watch documentaries on history and conspiracy theories

Watch a TV series with my husband

Go to the beach with my family

Have coffee with a good friend

Blog/Journal


Now, I wouldn't necessarily call these things "passions", but are all things that make me smile. If you have read any of my past posts you will know that my true passion lies in interior design. For whatever reason, it always has been and I don't see myself losing that passion anytime soon. After years of putting it off, I finally went back to school for interior design and words cannot express the happiness that pursuing a passion has brought to me. Seriously. The little things that previously bothered me don't matter as much. I've made some new friends that I can blabber to about the Eames chair I would love to have and they know what I'm talking about, lol! Next term I have registered for 12 credits (that's 5 courses!) and while I am pooping my pants just thinking about it, I know that it is going to be 5x what I'm feeling now. I'm working towards a goal and as the author of The Happiness Project says, "being happier requires you to think about feeling good, feeling bad, and feeling right, in an atmosphere of growth. In other words, to be happier, I need to boost my good feelings, put a stop to my bad feelings, and pursue my right feelings." This is exactly one of the things I love most about interior design; the transformation/creation of something beautiful. It's the growth of a space from ugly to beautiful, or from nothing to amazing. 

While the homework will be overwhelming at times, I know that happiness lies in balance... hence the name of this blog "Balancing Act". Making time for my kids, my husband and my friends, as well as running/meditating and eating right are all equally important. Mind, Body and Soul. The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin is full of tidbits of research and I found this to be particularly interesting... "Studies show that people think that they will be slightly happier in the future than they are in the present. And research shows that a sense of purpose is very important to happiness. And why do happiness researchers report that children don’t make people happier, and yet parents insist that their children are a major source of joy?"

I'm often told that people can't believe I'm so honest about my feelings on children/parenting. One of the things I have found most gratifying about being honest is that people have said to me, "I've never met anyone who has admitted they don't play with their kids. I've always felt so guilty that I don't enjoy playing with my own children." I'm not saying that I don't like my kids, but I refuse to feel bad that I don't play Barbies/cars with them. And do you know what has happened to my kids? They are independent, confident little beings that don't need me to hold their hand all the time. They have learned to problem solve on their own and quite often, they are the ones teaching me things (in their own little way). What I enjoy most about watching my children grow up is seeing them grow. Matching my daughter grow from a thumpy, little elephant to a graceful dancer... My son grow from a Bambi-legged skater to a very determined and skilled hockey player. They are pursuing their own passions, and if the day comes they don't want to dance or play hockey, I will enjoy watching them pursue a different passion. Often happiness doesn't lie in your own self; it lies in the happiness of the ones you care the most about.

With Christmas just around the corner, I've been thinking a lot about the things that make other people happy. What are the passions of each of my family members? How can I give meaningful gifts this Christmas and teach my kids what the meaning of Christmas is for our family. For Christians it is the celebration of Jesus' birth; for me it is the celebration of love for friends and family and a time to be together and to be generous to the fellow person. This month, while pursuing my own passions, I hope I will inspire others to pursue their own... with maybe a little gift to go with it. ;)